Exhausted

I am a person who generally has no trouble sleeping. I can "rest my eyes" on couches, in cars, and certainly in beds. It tends to be a running joke. In fact, I once called me husband in a panic, convinced our house was filling with carbon monoxide, since I was sitting on our couch at 9 pm and couldn't keep my eyes open. (By the way, thank you Oprah for planting that little seed in my head) Instead of taking me seriously, he cracked up laughing and basically hung up on me.

Cue Rodney Dangerfield, cause I don't get no respect.

One of the governing rules of parenting is that you only sleep as well as your children sleep. Last night, I was SOL, as our little girl had a stuffy nose that caused her to be restless all night long. I woke up roughly every 45 minutes, got her settled, got sucked into whatever episode of SVU was on USA, fell asleep before the case was resolved, repeat ad nauseum.

Now, in the midst of this relative chaos, my husband was snoring away next to me...loudly. I hit him, trying to get him to roll on his back, chanting his name over and over, trying to get him to stir enough to at least stop the snoring. It was then that I noticed what he was wearing: NOISE CANCELLING HEADPHONES! I'm sorry, is the volume of the TV, set to the lowest possible level, interfering with your ability to snore with enough force to shake the god damn bed?!

Now I'm sitting here watching a movie with our son, hoping my industrial strength coffee is enough to keep me going for the rest of the day, while my husband's snores drift down from the second floor. Guess who's noise cancelling headphones will be floating in the toilet in no time flat?